I have work in a few hours and I can't stop crying nor sleep and it's going to be a ten hour work day. The last two years have been the hardest of all my years of living, because I got to experience what love is. Not everyone get's to feel what true love is and I had a chance to get a glipse at what it was up close and I am thankful for the beautiful experience.
My friday night included me doing some graphic design work for my new Youtube channel and surfed the web while super high from weed. When I smoke weed I tend to think a lot about the issues going on in my life and they tend to scare me. I've been talking to my ex that I recently broke up with and dated for two years. He just texted me "I don't want to put a label on this." after I confronted him about the photo where a guy looked like he had his ass on him and he was sticking his toung out at it, I can still hear these words in my head "I'm just having fun, I don't see what the big deal is.". We weren't even together anymore but have been talking which is the funny thing why it hurts even more. The moment I saw that photo I felt so mad because the moment he got home he called me while he was drunk. All he wanted to do was have virtual sex, and this made me mad because I was home crying about the relationship. I've asked a few friends and family members about the photo and they thought it looked a little weird. The breakup has not been remotely easy on me, because I feel like someone has passed away and I can't get them back. I've tried everything but it wasn't enough to keep him. He was to far gone for me to pull him back in, and I have to live with that. Two lost souls searching for love found it but didn't nurture it like it needed to be. Love is a fragile thing, and you must take care of it. One stab will result in the heart not functioning correctly and with many stabs the heart will stop beating. You can try to revive it but it's not guaranteed to pump an inch of blood again. |
Jared ValdezMy legacy will speak for itself. Here I leave my thoughts on the journey. Take this as my digital imprint on society and my life story said in words. Archives
May 2024
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